The End of an Era

So, I'm a day or two late on this I know, but cut me some slack, I'm writing a novel. It was announced this week that Bob Barker will retire from "The Price is Right" (which is incidentally the Rogue's favorite game show) this June at the age of 83, after 35 seasons with the show. This is monumental. Even before TPIR (as I like to call it) Barker was a television star. He hosted his first national game show with "Truth and Consequences" in 1956. That makes this Dec. 31st his 50th year in television. That's impressive by any standards. "The Price is Right" sets a record everyday it is on the air, since it is the longest running game show, and nearly the longest running television program, period.

Some of you may have gotten your first taste of "the Bob" as a child watching TPIR with your mother or grandmother. Others might never have known the phenomenon that is Bob Barker until they saw his famous (and award winning) fight with Adam Sandler in "Happy Gilmore," a film that still stands as a beacon of cinema perfection. But some of you might still have been blissfully unaware of Barker's name and place in television history if not for his unfortunate legal entanglements. It seems our buddy, Bob, likes to play grab-ass, and occasionally it's with someone that doesn't want to play back. Naughty, naughty, Bob!

Sure he's got some deviant (or at least unappreciated) romantic methods, but the guy is a television legend! Did you expect him to be like John Q Public? A star as big as Bob doesn't have time to woo a women slowly. His time is far too valuable for all that jazz. He's got to get straight to the point and, in the opinion of this writer, the ladies should just get used to it. A chance to get it on with the Geriatric Godfather (or is that grandfather?) of TV doesn't come along everyday. I think the ladies should feel privileged. There are millions of young ladies out there that Bob could have grabbed in inappropriate ways, but he chose you.

CBS is sending Bob off in style with a prime time special chronicling and honoring his 35 years on TPIR. Les Moonves, CBS President, had this to say, "Bob Barker is a daytime legend, an entertainment icon and one of the most beloved television personalities of our time. His contribution, not only to CBS and television as a whole, but also to the history of sexual harassment, will be the measure of excellence that television personalities will be judged by for years to come. I wish I could be half the harasser that Bob is." I think Leslie put it about as well as anyone could.

So, Bob, I hope you enjoy your retirement. Without the busy schedule of filming 60 minutes worth of mindless banter a day, you'll have plenty of time for window-peeping and pinching bottoms. That's a retirement I think we all would look forward to. And remember folks, help control Sexual harassments Suits, have your game show host spayed or neutered. Goodbye, everybody.