25 Years, 16 Days, 16 Goals

On September 21st, not only am I taking a day off of work, to bask in the happiness that is my birthday, but I'm also going to go talk to my insurance representative and get my rates lowered. Now that's exciting! You are currently enjoying (well, you're reading, I can't speak to enjoyment) the latest in a series of blogs celebrating the most auspicious occasion of my birthday! Lucky you. I am listing goals (one a day) that I hope to accomplish in the next 25 years I hope to enjoy on Terra Firma (that's solid ground for those that don't speak Latin, which is, you know, everbody). Here's today's goal.

16. Appear on an episode of VH1's "Best Week Ever" (or whatever show takes it's place in the next few years). -- This is not to be confused with "Behind the Music" or the "E! True Hollywood Story" which generally end in tragedy. I'd like to have no part of those. Also I am not interested in "Where Are They Now?" where no doubt they'd find me selling BMX bikes with my wife in the hills of San Diego or something, reminicising about my former fame. Nope, I want on "Best Week Ever." And I'd be happy to appear either as a subject (ie. Joel's new book is so hot! It sold like a billion copies this week and is now forever in the pantheon of Pop culture) or as a commentator (ie. I said years ago that Suri Cruise was the Anti-Christ, but no one believed me!). As cheap, hollow, and useless as the show is, I find it fascinating, and since I seem to be making the entertainment rounds this week with my goals, here we are. So VH1, if Andy Dick is unavailable due to illness, or weirdness, please know you can contact me anytime.

16 Shopping Days, until I pounce upon you and demand tribute in honor of my birth anniversary. I'm playin' you don't really have to get me anything. But a real friend would...