The Man Who Changed My Life...Tayadore Goosel

I've been trying to write this post for like two weeks. I have argued with myself, back and forth, about whether it's a good idea. You see this post is about my job. I know, I've made no mention of what radio station I work for, but it wouldn't take Colombo to fit the pieces together. Damn, I knew I should never have used my real name. Alright that ship has sailed. I've read the same articles you have about personal blogs getting people fired. So here we are two weeks later and I'm gonna write it anyway.

I'm a Dj (in case there are people who skip right past the profile). I work the afternoon shift at a country station. I also run a Texas music show on Monday's. Now overall this is a great job. I don't go to work till about 11:30am. I work inside in a (most of the time) climate controlled environment. I like my coworkers, and honestly there are much worse ways to make an honest wage (and even worse ways to make a dishonest one). The job does however have some drawbacks. Most of these involve people.

I've listened to Country music my entire life. I have a college degree. I've read books, some without pictures. I like to think of myself as an experienced, educated young man. Apparently I am alone in the world of Country music lovers. In the interest of brevity, I am sharing only the top three listener/Dj interactions. If you are interested in learning more become a Dj, or poke yourself in the eye several times (that's what I call the at-home Dj experience).

Names have been changed to protect the innocent, and the stupid.

3. Patton - Patton is a Vietnam vet, God bless him. He and his wife are retired and he enjoys nothing more than listening to me on the radio and calling in to tell me something I don't know. Once he called to tell me that his wife was the first person that ever used the expression "hump day" to mean Wednesday. Another example:

Drunken Rogue: (Radio Station Name deleted)
Patton: This is Patton up here in West Lake, how you doin' today?
DR: Good, Patton. What can I do for you?
P: You know that Larry King show they got on the tv, there?
DR: Yeah.
P: Well they had ole' Dolly Parton on last night, a talkin' about the Country music 'wards bein' held there in New York. D'you watch that?
DR: No I didn't.
P: Well I was watchin' it there last night and I just thought to myself, well that's awful fittin' 'cause you know Country music was invented in New York.
DR: Oh? It wasn't in Nashville?
P: Oh naw. Fellow by the name of Al Dexter invented the whole thang in New York.
DR: Really?
P: Yep.
DR: Well that's interesting man, I gotta let you go though, OK I'm about to have a commercial.
P: Well I just thought I'd share that.
DR: Thank you.

2. William - William has a washing machine. I know this because he is constantly washing clothes. What William doesn't have is a dryer. (Good thing for me that probably means he doesn't have a computer either) Every two to three days, William calls to get a weather forecast. The exchange goes much like this:

DR: (Radio Station Name)
William: Hey, who's this?
DR: This is Joel, what can I do for you?
W: What's the, what's forecast for tonight?
DR: Well we've got a 70% chance of rain, there's a front moving in from Texas and a low tonight of 52.
W: Do you think it's gonna rain?
DR: Yeah, probably so with that front movin' in. 70% chance.
W: So would you say I could hang some clothes out on the line tonight?
DR: Not unless you want them to get wet, man.
W: No I want 'em to get dry.
DR: Yeah, I wouldn't hang 'em out tonight. Alright? Thanks, for calling.

And without a doubt the number one listener call in of my entire two year career in radio.

Susy - When I first started full-time at the station, I worked middays. In the noon hour we ran a trivia game to win a free lunch. I can't tell you how much people love the idea of free lunch. This particular day was Dr. Seuss' birthday. I thought, why not be topical. So I asked, "Kids all over are celebrating Dr. Seuss' birthday today. Dr. Seuss is of course the pseudonym for the author of several beloved children's books, like 'The Cat in the Hat' and 'How the Grinch Stole Christmas.' What is Dr. Seuss' real name?" Susy was my first caller.

DR: (Radio Station Name)
Susy: Jim Carrey.
DR: Excuse me?
Susy: His name is Jim Carrey.
DR: No ma'am. Jim Carrey played the Grinch in the movie version of that story, but I'm looking for the real name of Dr. Seuss, the author of the book.
Susy: It wasn't Jim Carrey that played it?
DR: No, it was Jim Carrey. But I asked who wrote the book.
Susy: Dr. Seuss.
DR: Yes, ma'am. Dr. Seuss, but that wasn't his real name. I want to know his real name.
Susy: Oh, OK.

Susy hangs up. I take a couple of other callers none of which get the right answer. In a couple of minutes the phone rings again.

DR: (Radio Station Name)
Susy: I got it now.
DR: OK. What was Dr. Seuss' real name.
Susy: (I'll spell it phonetically because the real humor is in the sound) Tay-uh-dor-ay Goosel!
DR: (Sure that I didn't hear it right) What was that?
Susy: (excited because she knows she has it right) Tay-uh-dor-ay Goosel!

Now for those that don't know, Dr. Seuss, beloved children's author, was actually Theodor Geisel. Now Geisel is an odd last name, and I could give anyone the benefit of a doubt on that, but the idea that Susy had never seen the name Theodor in print, well that was enough for me to give her the lunch. Congratulations Susy, and God bless Tayadore Goosel.